THE DESIRE FOR SECURITY

          The feeling of guilt (bad) is based in noncompliance with moral code standards. Guilt can be experienced as a result of: 1) not living up to expectations established by you, 2) someone else, or 3) some other perceived outside authority. Resolution is partly dependent on determining the origin of the guilt in one of those three realms. In other words, “Whose moral code standards am I in conflict with?” Of course, guilt can be experienced on any level of awareness.
          Intense guilt that is produced from a deep subconscious level of awareness is possibly rooted in early childhood: “I feel really bad. I just can’t figure out why, and it makes no sense to me.”
          Guilt is an unpleasant and powerful emotion. Beneath the experience of guilt you may find a desire for security or approval. This is a simple, yet perhaps compelling way to explain the power of guilt as being related to a fear of loss of security or approval. The subconscious mind may equate guilt with being disconnected from the group, severe hardship, punishment, or even death as a result of having done something wrong. From an ego perspective, it is dangerous to be ostracized or ousted from the group. As you experience guilt, you may automatically become defensive, shift blame, point fingers, or find other ways to keep power and control, and sustain an idealized public view. In a larger sense, your ego would like to maintain its value or power in the group. Essentially, a positive view of ourselves gives us a sense of security, “I’m ok.” Thus, underlying the experience of guilt may be a desire for security or approval. Understanding the concept of guilt in this manner may transform how you deal with it.